Consider the Facts
I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for
driving under the
influence of alcohol.
I pled guilty, paid a fine, and had my driver's
license uspended for 30
days.
My Texas driving record has been "lost" and is not
available.
MILITARY:
I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went AWOL.
I refused to take a drug test or answer any
questions about my drug use.
By joining the Texas Air National Guard, I was able
to avoid combat duty in Vietnam.
COLLEGE:
I graduated from Yale University with a low C
average. I was a cheerleader.
PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:
I ran for U.S. Congress and lost. I began my career
in the oil business in Midland, Texas, in 1975.
I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil
in Texas. The company
went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.
I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a
sweetheart deal that took land
using taxpayer money.
With the help of my father and our right-wing
friends in the oil industry (including Enron CEO Ken
Lay), I was elected governor of Texas.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR OF TEXAS:
I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and
oil companies, making
Texas the most polluted state in the Union.
During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as
the most smog ridden city in America.
I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the
tune of billions in
borrowed money.
I set the record for the most executions by any
governor in American
history.
With the help of my brother, the governor of
Florida, and my father's
appointments to the Supreme Court, I became
President after losing by over 500,000 votes.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT:
I am the first President in U.S. history to enter
office with a criminal
record.
I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing
cost of over one
billion dollars per week.
I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupted
the U.S. Treasury.
I shattered the record for the largest annual
deficit in U.S. history.
I set an economic record for most private
bankruptcies filed in any 12 month
period.
I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a
12 month period.
I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in
the history of the U.S. stock market.
In my first year in office, over 2 million Americans
lost their jobs and
that trend continues every month.
I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the
richest of any
administration in U.S. history.
My "poorest millionaire," Condoleeza Rice, has a
Chevron oil tanker named after her.
I set the record for most campaign fundraising trips
by a U.S. President.
I am the all-time U.S. and world record holder for
receiving the most
corporate campaign donations.
My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of
my best friends,
Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate
bankruptcy fraud in U.S. History, Enron.
My political party used Enron private jets and
corporate attorneys to assure
my success with the U.S. Supreme Court during my
election decision.
I have protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton
against investigation or prosecution. More time and
money was spent investigating the Monica
Lewinsky affair than has been spent investigating
one of the biggest
corporate rip offs in history.
Yo Peep
I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S.
history and refused to
intervene when corruption involving the oil industry
was revealed.
I presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S.
history.
I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted
criminals to be awarded
government contracts.
I appointed more convicted criminals to
administration than any President in
U.S. history.
I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the
largest bureaucracy in the history of the United
States government.
I've broken more international treaties than any
President in U.S. history.
I am the first President in U.S. history to have the
United Nations remove the U.S. from the Human Rights
Commission.
I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.
I refused to allow inspectors access to U.S.
"prisoners of war" detainees and thereby have
refused to abide by the Geneva Convention.
I am the first President in history to refuse United
Nations election
inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. election).
I set the record for fewest number of press
conferences of any President
since the advent of television.
I set the all-time record for most days on vacation
in any one year period.
After taking off the entire month of August, I
presided over the worst
security failure in U.S. history. I garnered the
most sympathy for the U.S.
after the World Trade Center attacks and less than a
year later made the
U.S. the most hated country in the world, the
largest failure of diplomacy in world history.
I have set the all time record for most people
worldwide to simultaneously protest me in public
venues (15 million people), shattering the record
for protest against any person in the history of
mankind.
I am the first President in U.S. history to order an
unprovoked, preemptive attack and the military
occupation of a sovereign nation. I did so against
the will of the United Nations, the majority of U.S.
citizens, and the world
community.
I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and
support a cut in duty benefits for active duty
troops and their families in war time.
In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our
reasons for attacking
Iraq, then blamed the lies on our British friends.
I am the first President in history to have a
majority of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as
the biggest threat to world peace and security.
I am supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical
Bunker Buster," a WMD.
I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring
Osama Bin Laden and
Saddam Hussein to justice.
RECORDS AND REFERENCES:
All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are
now in my father's
library, sealed and unavailable for public view.
All records of SEC investigations into my insider
trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in
secrecy and unavailable for public view.
All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my
Vice President, attended regarding public energy
policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for
public review.
I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for
driving under the
influence of alcohol.
I pled guilty, paid a fine, and had my driver's
license uspended for 30
days.
My Texas driving record has been "lost" and is not
available.
MILITARY:
I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went AWOL.
I refused to take a drug test or answer any
questions about my drug use.
By joining the Texas Air National Guard, I was able
to avoid combat duty in Vietnam.
COLLEGE:
I graduated from Yale University with a low C
average. I was a cheerleader.
PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:
I ran for U.S. Congress and lost. I began my career
in the oil business in Midland, Texas, in 1975.
I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil
in Texas. The company
went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.
I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a
sweetheart deal that took land
using taxpayer money.
With the help of my father and our right-wing
friends in the oil industry (including Enron CEO Ken
Lay), I was elected governor of Texas.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR OF TEXAS:
I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and
oil companies, making
Texas the most polluted state in the Union.
During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as
the most smog ridden city in America.
I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the
tune of billions in
borrowed money.
I set the record for the most executions by any
governor in American
history.
With the help of my brother, the governor of
Florida, and my father's
appointments to the Supreme Court, I became
President after losing by over 500,000 votes.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT:
I am the first President in U.S. history to enter
office with a criminal
record.
I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing
cost of over one
billion dollars per week.
I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupted
the U.S. Treasury.
I shattered the record for the largest annual
deficit in U.S. history.
I set an economic record for most private
bankruptcies filed in any 12 month
period.
I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a
12 month period.
I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in
the history of the U.S. stock market.
In my first year in office, over 2 million Americans
lost their jobs and
that trend continues every month.
I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the
richest of any
administration in U.S. history.
My "poorest millionaire," Condoleeza Rice, has a
Chevron oil tanker named after her.
I set the record for most campaign fundraising trips
by a U.S. President.
I am the all-time U.S. and world record holder for
receiving the most
corporate campaign donations.
My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of
my best friends,
Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate
bankruptcy fraud in U.S. History, Enron.
My political party used Enron private jets and
corporate attorneys to assure
my success with the U.S. Supreme Court during my
election decision.
I have protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton
against investigation or prosecution. More time and
money was spent investigating the Monica
Lewinsky affair than has been spent investigating
one of the biggest
corporate rip offs in history.
Yo Peep
I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S.
history and refused to
intervene when corruption involving the oil industry
was revealed.
I presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S.
history.
I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted
criminals to be awarded
government contracts.
I appointed more convicted criminals to
administration than any President in
U.S. history.
I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the
largest bureaucracy in the history of the United
States government.
I've broken more international treaties than any
President in U.S. history.
I am the first President in U.S. history to have the
United Nations remove the U.S. from the Human Rights
Commission.
I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.
I refused to allow inspectors access to U.S.
"prisoners of war" detainees and thereby have
refused to abide by the Geneva Convention.
I am the first President in history to refuse United
Nations election
inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. election).
I set the record for fewest number of press
conferences of any President
since the advent of television.
I set the all-time record for most days on vacation
in any one year period.
After taking off the entire month of August, I
presided over the worst
security failure in U.S. history. I garnered the
most sympathy for the U.S.
after the World Trade Center attacks and less than a
year later made the
U.S. the most hated country in the world, the
largest failure of diplomacy in world history.
I have set the all time record for most people
worldwide to simultaneously protest me in public
venues (15 million people), shattering the record
for protest against any person in the history of
mankind.
I am the first President in U.S. history to order an
unprovoked, preemptive attack and the military
occupation of a sovereign nation. I did so against
the will of the United Nations, the majority of U.S.
citizens, and the world
community.
I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and
support a cut in duty benefits for active duty
troops and their families in war time.
In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our
reasons for attacking
Iraq, then blamed the lies on our British friends.
I am the first President in history to have a
majority of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as
the biggest threat to world peace and security.
I am supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical
Bunker Buster," a WMD.
I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring
Osama Bin Laden and
Saddam Hussein to justice.
RECORDS AND REFERENCES:
All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are
now in my father's
library, sealed and unavailable for public view.
All records of SEC investigations into my insider
trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in
secrecy and unavailable for public view.
All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my
Vice President, attended regarding public energy
policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for
public review.
