Waste of time?

JPeg

ILLIEN
ill o.g.
2day is one of them days – call it negative, lack of faith or just ultra realistic but 2day I can honestly say I don’t think I’m gonna make it! And the serious thing is I aint just talking about hip-hop and production I’m talking about life general – period that’s fucked up.

I’m not at uni anymore I aint got hella free time to sit around and make beats and dream about all the shit I wanna do, all I do is wake up jump on the train go to a 9 to 5 full of peeps I don’t relate to and don’t give a fuck about than go home tired.

Wild out a bit and get high on the weekend than go and do it all over again. I only started working a proper full time job in January of this year and I’m fed up already.

Now that shit can inspire u to do work harder and diversify more to escape the 9 to 5 but 2day that shit got the best of me.
Why am I writing this? I don’t know however this feeling gives me something to rap about but even rap aint enuff. Life is should be more than just work and more than just hip-hop and the answer aint religion so whats next?

U know who I envy cats like hiero and living legends cause they both tight crews of like minded individuals all progressing making moves doing shit without waiting for a label just dropping albums travelling and rocking mics.

I live in London Uk hip hop is ignored by many and that’s cool but I seem to find myself amongst the wrong people I mean some of my peeps aint hip hop at all and that’s cool but the one that are just sit around and write rhymes at home plus talk about how great they are instead of having a do for self mentality to get things done.
So I’m on some lone wolverine marine biologist type shit, which don’t help at times like this.
But yo if u read all this bullshit I just wrote and ur thinking wtf here is the

QUESTION: What if u don’t make it in hip hop? As producer/label owner/emcee nothing what will u do? Can u deal with the fact that in theory u may neva achieve what u set out to do in the game?

Do u sometimes feel the time and energy and money u put into hip-hop could be better spent?

If u neva think on any of this shit fuck it than peace out
 

J-UK

Um........
ill o.g.
Battle Points: 3
I often think that I might not ever make any money out of music and that I could be wasting my time but then as soon as I sit down and make a beat I then realise that I don't really care because I enjoy it way too much! As long as I keep on making music that I want to listen to I couldn't care less if I make a career out of it.

Since you are living in London I think you should try to find some rappers and producers who are on the same level as you cause there are LOADS of rappers in London who are just waitin to find a good beat maker.
 

bigdmakintrax

BeatKreatoR
ill o.g.
Battle Points: 123
Man what the hell is wrong with you??????? this shidd is like an art form..U know like a fuggin painter and his easel....thing is most of them never make it and the ones that do just get by....but the thing that keeps them in it is the love for the love of the art..of art...now man sound like you let the day get ya, I have been thru the same shidd but you know what i use the beats as my outlet fugg getting signed I mean hell make beats, get an mc every now and then to do some spitting, or get 100% do or die, this is not a game serious and do this shidd no matter what....now get in there and make it happen....
 
C

Copenhagen

Guest
I feel you a little JPeg. I have days from time to time where I think like that in regards to my life as a whole.
Like, will my dreams ever come true, will I make it...is it all worth it and why the hell was I placed on this god forsaken planet...it's just a thing you go through from time to time.
Personally, I just think too much and sit around philosiphing (is that spelled correctly)...we're all different.
We might make it, we might not...we can sit around a be pissed about it...or we can try our best...and if it doesn't work out, at least we tried...at least we had hopes and dreams.
 

Rob-Les

ILLIEN
ill o.g.
JPeg...I feel you son! I too felt like that many times. The struggle of the 9-5 does get to you. If you don't have the right peeps around you, it can be even worst cause then you fall into this deep hole which is sometimes hard to get out of. This is where hip-hop comes in. If it wasn't for beats and rhymes, shit would be even harder to come out of. Let hip hop be your relief dawg. Use that negative energy and create masterpieces! Fud them cats at work! Keep making music regardless. Don't think about whether you're gonna make it or not, you're here, so you made it. Aight, so there's my "fifty cents".

RustyStabz
 

Cold Truth

IllMuzik Moderator
ill o.g.
Battle Points: 25
wow. it has really been a day for the guys here at ILLMUZIK! man....
i get you completely... all i know is that at this point in my life, i have dealt with entirely too much to abandon my dreams now, but then if i wind up being called to do other things with my life, well, then so be it. i know God can be a touchy subject for some of you- and we all have our own beliefs, philosophies, etc., but i will say that you ARE here for a reason, and you HAVE the passion for this for a reason, and you have the TALENTS and ABILITIES you have for a reason, and i hope that you dont give up on it.

i know its hard tho- about two years ago i had tp be up at 4:30 every morning to get ready and walk 3 miles- literally- to my bus stop and ride the bus for 2 1/2 hours and walk another mile to work, there and back. i would get home at like 9:30- 10 at night...... plus i was the scheduler ( for directtv) so i couldnt leave until i was finished, so i would wind up working 12-13 hour shifts at times, and there were a few times where i wouldnt be able to get home until the weekend.. for nine months i did that. i finally got a car, but i couldnt really drive it cause i didnt have a license or have it registered plus i bought it with expired tags... i lived out of it for the last few months of my time at direct tv....
then my little sister died.... then i got my car impounded on easter morning!!! ( i also caught $2000.00 in fines and 4 days in county jail) so yeah, i feel you!!! ..........

the point here is that things are very different for me now.... i have a job that i love going to every day, i actually make a difference in kids lives doing what i do now, i get paid well and i get along with (most) everyone... i get paid holidays, 4 hours of vacation time per pay period, we even have a free, catered breakfast once a month that i get PAID to attend......... a year ago i had a frickin Boss DR 202 and SP 202 with no mixer (my "friends" from the previous summer broke it.) and that was it.... now ive got a motif rack, an mpc 2000 and a very underated fourtrack (korg/toneworks pxr4) and im about to add a mixer, outs on the mpc, turntables, and god knows what else!! ! i just hope that you are encouraged because no matter how bad things get they can get that much better...... which isnt to say life is perfect. there are still a lot of problems to deal with, but things are way different then what they were two years ago.
 

inrctyhoodmusic

Muzik Militant
ill o.g.
Battle Points: 5
Being a big time athelet in high school Two sport major player letters from D1 schools I always thought I would be in the NFL or MLB but the best thing anyone ever told me was have something to fall back on...My grand father said "nigga yo ass always gone need a saftey net"...He was right after a few wrong turns I ended up doing a few wrong things and blowing it all it hurts but hey you need something to fall back on.....The only things garunteed in life is DEATH AND TAXES.....If you want something you have to make it happen
 
C

Copenhagen

Guest
Just to bug you Truth, in Northern Europe we generally have between 6-8 weeks paid vacation.
And for me personally, I have free catered breakfast every Friday. There's 300 girls at my work and 50 guys...which makes some nice company parties.
I get a nice paycheck even though I'm without education.
We get bonuses.
I could keep on going...the bad part though is that I don't really appreciate it and still just keep dreaming about making it to a least be able to make music as a job...
 

themucka

"The man behind the Hits"
ill o.g.
nothing personal!!! but you got issues..
to me your 1st problem... is trying yo make a line in what's hip hop and whats not..
2nd your can't be 2 bad u got girls 2 look at it... comp parties..
this is real...
i haven't tooken my girl out in 2 years.. i live out my block..
my habits force me 2 stay home.. and take care of buisness..

cuz i have a record.. I CAN'T GET THAT DECENT JOB.. BUT FUCK IT...
everybody got a story...
what u got 2 do is keep RISING UP.. i got a trk i'm gonna make 4 you.. this wkend
use the stuggle an fuel... keep focus.. the peole that make it never give up..

u need 2 focus on the now.... and then the future..
study the past.. but don't focus on it...

and mostly it's distribution... we can't get your music.. u can get ours
there some good songs i've heard from europe..
but i don't understand it.. and to me the production not as tight as the States.. US
 

Cold Truth

IllMuzik Moderator
ill o.g.
Battle Points: 25
hey cope... that doesnt bug me at all!!! i wasnt bragging!! i was just saying, things are GOOD now!!!! im glad you get all those benifits!!!! if the next man has it better, then i am happy for him............ but you should appreciate it, even if its just a stop along the way to your eventual musical desiny!!! hey, just to bug YOU, cope, i appreciate my job!!!! i get to help kids who went through the same mess i did........hahahahahhhahaahahahaah top that!!!! (in case noone realizes it, that was a joke!!)
 
C

Copenhagen

Guest
Originally posted by drew_petti
click on this link, it might make your day better...this shit is hilarious...

just think...thank god you arent THIS guy!!!!!!!

enjoy!!!!!!!

That's what happen when you don't have your peeps at Illmuzik to help you through the struggles.

themucka, I think I'll start a thread soon where us european peeps can post links to european groups so you us peeps can peep what's happening over here...(a lot of peeping in this post)... ;)
 

Knock Out

Rap's Genious
ill o.g.
To everyone: *I've survived cancer, been on welfare, and watched my brother come on and off a heroine addiction about 8 times. To be honest, I'm just happy to be alive. I personally am a little dude, (skinny I mean, I'm 5'8 which isn't too small,) but I'm maaad talented when it comes to creative things. I feel like god perposely made me un-athletic, but gave me a drawing/music making/writing talent instead. I'm on such another level than anyone in my school, every kid that raps is on some basic shit... not only am I producing 3 albums right now, but I'm working on my own also. (I have a completed album I'll be advertising ON THIS SITE soon, (I was talking to Fade about it already.) When you're up your up, when you're down you're down. Some days you get hyped up and feel like you'll make it, some days you wonder why you try. Regardless, I'm only 17 and I'm doing bigger things than anyone I know my age. I'm proud of that. I simply just realized that life is what you make it, so make it hot...
 
J

joblack00

Guest
hmmm life is crazy JPEG. I am in the similiar situation like you. Hate the 9-5 get real pissed and depressed. Party on the weekends do the whole gettin ya mind right biz then do it all over again. Some days you wanna put a hole in the head of everyone who looks at you for to long as you walk to the train station. Others you wonder why am I here. But the most important thing I am doing for myself is going to college and exploring other options. Now that I think about where I am as an aspiring producer I realize music has always been with me and the consciousness. For years I would hear sounds and words and samples and say that would make an interesting rap song until this summer I decided to get to work and I like it.

Yeah I ain't made no money off of a beat but I use music as my release from preventing me from being the next Columbine. And Illmuzik puts me in touch with alot of people who real like me and think there is WAY to much Crap in Hip Hop. If I never make it I hope some of yawl cats go on to repair the damage corporate america has done to the game by allowing cats like CHINGY to have a number one song in the country but not one ounce of talent.

I also like the idea that these cats know they are expendible and can easily be replaced and knowing that just might make them work harder...Well that's my spiel.

If none of this gets to you try a relocation or a vacation those always work for me
 

JPeg

ILLIEN
ill o.g.
wow im suprised by the response good looking out to all who posted on this thread, i was expect to come back to a whole load of peeps dissing me (guess I spend to much time on ughh)

I was getting ready for my retort "im an artist please dont laff at me" lol

but on the real u all seem like some cool cats, we all at slightly different points but the common theme is (desire and the love for the artform)

I may get depressed at times but they dont call me the comeback kid for nuthing cause i dont stay down 4 long.
But i think the key is to balance out all the things u enjoy and all the things u need to get dont in order to progress on all levels.

so im back in it producing and rappin fuck it..

rock on, lol
 

Fade

The Beat Strangler
Administrator
illest o.g.
Very interesting responses here, and I can feel what a lot of you guys are saying. Anyone that knows me can tell you that I've been through a whole mess of shit for the past few years (no job/no money/no life! lol)... so by spending lots of time doing what I love doing (making beats and working on IllMuzik), I'm able to get my mind off of the negative.

Which brings up another question.... What are some of the things you guys do to relax and get away from everything? Listening to music is one thing, but watching movies really makes me forget all my problems for at least 2 hours.
 

The Konductor

ILLIEN
ill o.g.
I think about whether or not I'll make it all the time. Desire, knowledge, heart, and persistence are all key to the struggle. Although it does help to know someone in the business as with every business. Sadly it comes down to who you know if you want to make it "BIG". I'm not too concerned about makin it "BIG". I just want to make it, music that is. I know that if I work on my craft and develop my sound only good things will come.

Personally I have been blessed and I commend all ya'll who have stepped up and risen above obstacles and tragedies. Like Pac said "you gotta keep ya head up". Last but not least, location is important. You gota be in the mix, not just to get contacts, but to be able to get the feel and live the life of hip-hop. That's why New York cats are so tight. They live the life of hip-hop everyday and its like second nature. Its hard to stay focused and in touch if you're surrounded by hicks, or yuppies, or just plain stale types. I'm startin to realize that I need a cummunity that I can interact with on the daily. This site is great for that. But I still need some peeps to get down with. Thats my whole problem. I live in a little town called Pueblo (midwest, U.S.) and all these muthafuckas know is whats on MTV or the movies. No ones original, but yet they all think they're the shit. When I graduate college I'm out. I like cats like themucka who are willing to reach out and get some shit started, cause nobody does shit by them selves.
 
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