Never ending drama

[Mr.Ravioli]

Sup every1

lately shit has been gettin real tense n stressful in my house

Both my parents are control-freaks who feel like putin me in the middle of there arguments.

This shit has been goin on sense I was 5 years old,so by now I'm use to it.But 4 days ago shit seem to hit the fan.


The problem seem to start with me.My parents both admit that my birth was'nt exactly "Planned" so it makes me feel like I'm the problem.My father iz EXTREMELY protective of my mother and will not let her go places with me or my brothers.So somewhere along the line they decided that they hate each others guts and want a divorce but won't do,and it fucks with me to see my father say hateful shit about my moms and then stop her when she tries to leave,he has a very short temper and gets rild up easily,my mother really has ill will towards my dad and seldom says good things about him but she won't leave(Trust me she's had thousands of chances)

Basically there relation ship iz terrible but they won't divorce.They use to play this fucked up game with me when I was 7 where I had to decide who I wanted to live with,They made me chose on the spot and I could'nt because I loved them so equally.

My pops claims he's cheating and even put me on the phone with some girl to prove it but he won't let my mother leave,this shit has really made my relationship towards my parents so and I'm startin to seem them as nothin but 2 hypocrites.But I love them with all my heart,and thats the shit that killz me inside.I'm a good person at heart but sometimes I wanna be able to hate them,my love makes me feel like the villan n I wanna jsut say fuck it and forgive them but,they just do so much evil shit(Personally If I told you guys half of the shit they do to me and my bothers as well as themselves I;d probably get banned).I'm use to this drama but latelty shit has been gettin tense I think something bad iz headin my way.


Sometime I just wanna run away from everything,My friends,my parents,everything.
I know theres a reason for everything but I can't help being bent out of shape.I just wanna make music and live my life Fuck everything else,Thats my only clarity,my only peace and my only outlet.

PS:I don't mean to drop my problems on you guys but I just needed to get this off my chest.

 

[Blunt604]

yo dude. this is a hip hop production forum. not dr.phil.com.... no disrespect i know ya going thru tough times but why the hell u come in here and tell people this u shuld talk to a therapist or your Real life friends not a bunch of people in a hiphop forum cause it sounds like you aint doin too well right now..... and that u got serious issues.

 

[CampO]

yo dude. this is a hip hop production forum. not dr.phil.com.... no disrespect i know ya going thru tough times but why the hell u come in here and tell people this u shuld talk to a therapist or your Real life friends not a bunch of people in a hiphop forum cause it sounds like you aint doin too well right now..... and that u got serious issues.

Lol thats Real talk right there I mean This Site everyone a Fam its diff from most sites an shit an I feel you but I mean i jus came home feelin real nice and when i Clicked on your thread it made me think wtf are you posting about your mom and dads relationship for

I really duno what to say I never read the whole thread cuz its a downer but my Parents is divorced 2 and I would never bring it too Illmuzik too talk a bout . I mean ive been posting here for a Minute but theres just somethings I aint comfortable with people over the internet knowing , shit like this i would hanlde with my close personal friends not the world .

 

[Vince]

Your fourth post is a 'Help me, I'm sad' post?

Talk to your friends, and if you want a opinion you'll get one from me: Your dad sounds like an asshole, but that's about it.

And how old are you? Sounds like your 14. Just get out of there if it's too hard on you.

 

[eXampuL_oNe]

Relax yall, the man said he is just venting. Although, this post is a little extreme and should be kept under the table. I feel were your coming from, my parents used to be the same way almost Identically to how you discribed.. It's just part of life man, "What don't kill you aonly makes you stronger." Keep that in mind, go to the lab and pump out some heat!

 

[Anubis-Ra]

a child shouldn't have to make a choice such as which parent they want to live with. It sounds like your mom keeps gettin strung along by your dad. You and your mom need to bounce if yall can.

 

[The Bastard]

i wouldnt know about this first hand cuz i was raised by single mom since birth .however,a few of my friends that had parent problems when they were young went to go live with their aunts,uncles or grandparents. some other immediate family with a stable household. somethin to think about.

 

[Fade]

Even though he's new here, if he wants to vent, let him. I guess he just felt comfortable enough to post about that here.

 

[Formant024]

In your case; life gets better when you get older, but you gotta start now. Indeed, get out of the house and dont act in on drama, shit just gets perpetual.

 

[Mr.Ravioli]

Thanks guys,I'm sorry if I came on a bit too strong but I really needed to get this off my chest.

I know this probably sounds akwared but I feel more comfortable talkin to you guys then some theripist,

But I'm gonna put this bull-shit behind me focus more on my music.

 

[The Bastard]

I know this probably sounds akwared but I feel more comfortable talkin to you guys then some theripist,
QUOTE]
THATS UNDERSTANDABLE, WHEN U TALK TO A THERAPIST U HAVE TO LOOK STRAIGHT INTO THE EYES OF SUM GUY OR GIRL U NEVER MET BE4 AND TELL THEM YUR PROBLEMS,I USE TO HAVE TO DO THAT SHIT WIT MY GUIDANCE COUNSLER AT ELEMENTARY SCHOOL IT WAS AWKWARD AS HELL. I COULD SEE HOW ITD BE A LOT EASIER TO JUST TYPE SUMTHIN ONLINE AND GET A RESPONSE FROM PEOPLE THAT MIGHT HAVE BEEN THRU THE SAME SITUATION RATHER THEN SUM GUY THAT STUDIED THE SUBJECT IN COLLEGE.

 

[Eurydice]

I encourage you to always speak your mind. If you are in a hostile environment and need someone to speak to, then do it. Some people are being hypocrites, because yes, this may be a hip hop forum, but what does big asses and funny jokes, and other silly conversation have to do with music?
Anyways, in regards to your parents:
All in all you will always love your parents; the difference is that you need to love your self first. If you ever find your self in an emotionalLY abusive relationship, you need to get out. I can relate to your situation, my parents pulled the same thing on me when I was growing up; they would use me as a way to get back at each other. One day I said fuck it, and dipped. I got up and moved out, just because they were miserable, doesn’t mean I had to be. I have a belief that it’s sad when the parents act like kids, and their children have to grow up too quick and have to raise their parents. I feel for you, I really do. Here is what I suggest you do:

Evaluate your situation
Talk to your parents, if that doesn’t work, talk to an interested party (grandparents, aunt, uncle, ECT)
Seek advice or even a change of living space. Get a job, start saving for when you can move out. Either way I think you need to leave the situation, because the longer you stay the worst it will get. Just because your parents are comfortable and used to the environment, doesn’t mean that you should have to subject to this. I also think that when ever you feel the need to express your self, do it. Repressed emotions harbor and filter your soul. It will make you miserable. If you ever need to talk get at me.

 

[Producer_GyaL]

nice saying Eurydice!

 

[Chrono]

wow Eurydice, hope i meet a women who knows herself an the world like you. nice comments an advice. and Ravioli, drop at every Showcase you can here and get familiar with this comminty of serious beat makers. It helped me when i went through some shit an didn't have even one person to talk to or cared what i had to say. like Vince said your father is a huge fuckup and your mother doesn't have the strength to leave. i would concede to the fact that your parents made very bad choices way before you were born in their own personal lives and that all this shit has nothing to do with you. Believe that, ignore them till you can move out, and make beats cause all this shit will make you stronger as long as you don't allow their problems to become your problems. that would be a shame. peace Rav

 

[andreas]

Man Mr R.
It makes me feel really bad seeing what you wrote. And I can se why you've chosen this kinda forum (by forum I mean this kinda way to express yourself)
It's hard to vent this kinda stuff, and made easier by writing couse you don't have to confront us. You'r just writing to your cumputer.

I respect your guts to get it off your chest. I dunno, but it sounds like you might need someone "real" to talk to, perhaps cry out with.
I'm not saying this has to be a therapist or anything like that. A friend who cares or your grandfolks or people near to you would suffice.

It tares me up to hear yuor pa treating you like this. Man , making a kid chose between mom or dad is nothing less then manipulative and mean.

Man I hope you'll find some peace of mind and come to a decition of what to do.

Take refuge in your music. When I'm depressed and low I find that it's a good way to vent. But it'd only get you so far. Sooner or later you'll have to sit down with your folks and figure out a gameplan that doesn't entail pain and a misrebel way of life.

Man, if you need to vent. Don't be afraid of it. I saw some of the fellas was kinda steemed by it but I'm here to listen, as I know alot of my piers also are.

I hope you'll find your peace of mind / Andreas

 

[pancakebunnny]

wow... those first three replies were pretty fucked up. I couldn't be that cold to someone I didn't know IF I TRIED TO.


Mr. Ravioli (nice name!), damn man. Your situation sounds real messed up. There's nothing I can say that hasn't been said yet, other than you CAN love someone and not be able to stand them as a person. Just because someone you love is doing some devious, wrong, or coldhearted stuff, those actions don't take away from the fact that it is someone you love. The best thing you can hope for is that they'll realize their selfishness before it's too late, and SEE what it's doing to their kids, although it seems like a whole lot of damage has been done already.

Damn.

 

[The Bastard]

nice saying Eurydice!

me too right? i mean, i gave him good advice too.......

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